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http://shops.cafepress.com/TheNearbyFuture
-The entire Staff

We got a Burn Notice on you. You’re black listed.
An ominously nonchalant voice well say at the beginning of each episode. Sorry to those of you who like it, but Rika and I have to agree that its just plain corny! Remember that article where Rika said she was talking to Calister and I, and [...]

Several people are confused about what The Nearby Future is about.
“I was confused,” one reader told me before I karate chopped him in the face.
“What is this site all about?” Someone else asked before I drop-kicked them over three and a half continents.
Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you to our website. It literally speaks [...]

This year The Nearby Future staff has written a collective 48,747 words! Here are your favorite articles from staff members with the most page views (not counting Jala, because she writes pages, not posts).

Rika’s best articles: “Corn“, “Stress: Side Effects Include…”, and “The World is Not Coming to an End“
Calister F. Well’s best articles: “When [...]

Rika’s other site, Pinky Miranda Productions, has recently been updated with a new article.
“I know, I know, I haven’t been posting regularly.
That’s because I’m writing a novel in 100 days, and I’ve been focusing on my writing recently. (oh, you expected some standard excuse that all bloggers give? Psh, I think you forget whose blog [...]

What fun is it to predict the world’s impending demise? I can’t see the joy of telling people that the world will collapse in ten years when oil becomes too expensive. A professor from the University of Arizona recently published an article in The Arizona Republic about how civilization will unravel because of the current oil crisis, and I have some questions for him.

Unless the Hummer and large SUV owners have been living under a rock, the following facts are known by them:

Hummers and large, heavy, SUVs are expensive
A 2004 Hummer H2 SUV has 9.6 mpg compared to a Honda, who’s miles per gallon ranges from 20-50 mpg. So for sure all of the SUV and Hummer owners know that they’re paying more for the gas prices then other car owners.
The emissions from cars contributes to global warming, and by simply switching from a fifteen mpg car to a 30mpg, you are cutting your car’s CO2 emissions in half.

4:32 PM: hear Calister’s complaints about how the green flowers are too “girly”. Laugh along with him, promise that I’ll look into other templates, but secretly plan his demise.

4:46 PM: Check the site’s status and clap excitedly as I see that someone else BESIDES the staff actually commented!

4:56 PM: Reject Calister’s article on the stupid topics that have nothing to do with the future OR the environment OR technology. In the article rejection email, tell him that his next article should be about ice cream. Write a witty rejection letter in advance.

Welcome to the first annual staff contest for thenearbyfuture.com!

To vote for your favorite staff member, leave a comment below OR take our survey! Taking our survey would help us out a lot more, but you can do either one. We suggest the quick, four question survey.

The future is such that us mere mortals cannot possibly contemplate without humor. I wonder what cavemen would do if they saw us playing the Wii…. probably laugh. Heck, even the present day people still laugh when they see someone swinging that white remote and looking like an idiot.

Your mission, if you chose to accept it, is to save the human race from crazed environmentalists and politicians who don’t know what they’re doing, and to do it by way of knowledge and action. If you accept this challenge, go to The Wells Mission to receive more information and start your mission.

For your safety, this message will not self destruct.

The pen is mightier than the sword, but the mind is sharper than the pen.
Calister’s Thoughts:
Honestly, Socrates, I’m not into philosophy, but this is my favorite quote of all time. Sure, written words can hurt, but pure mind power beats all. If this was a game of rock-paper-scissors, knowledge could beat all of the above. [...]

You may think you know what the most advance societies of all time are. Us Americans are thinking, “Oh! The iphone! Our civilization must be the most advanced,” and as each new invention comes out we think the same thing. But these inventions aren’t something as great as discovering, say, the [...]

We are changing the way we think. How?

We are listening to America
We are investing in ideas that you send us
We are surfing Youtube
And we are writing MORE LISTS!
Lists about lists
Lists listing lists
Lists listing what we’re going to do for you, planet Earth
Listing listed Youtube videos
Abolishing the word ‘listed’ from being used any more in this [...]

Electronic books are a great thing- don’t listen to Rika. Ebook readers are so much more convenient then regular books. Paper can be destroyed easily- I mean, hey! Light a match around a book and there goes your book! (Not that the Sony Reader is fire proof or anything) But [...]

Hey all you people out there! This is Calister F. Wells here. I know posting entries is basically Rika’s thing but I’ve decided that Rika needs to get a life and let me be the head writer! *bows* It’s a good idea, I know. No need to applaud
Anyways, no need to babble about unnecessary [...]

CA-MRSA: it’s the super bug invading our schools and sending us on a cleaning frenzy. Inside most worried parent’s head is If I clean as much as possible with this antibacterial cleaners the danger will disappear. Well, I have news for you. Antibacterial cleaners may be making the problem worse. According to [...]