A fun, informative, and important site to survive the future.
4
Oct
omg bullets i dodge them Anyways. Time for a serious post at The Nearby Future.com. On our favorite subject. WHAT TO EXPECT ON THE NEARBY FUTURE IN OCTOBER So Sarah and I are preparing for our inevitable victory occurring next month during our annual National Novel Writing Month. So guess what lies in our nearby [...]
Tags: bulllets, mad action, monkeys
26
Sep
People who don’t eat healthy cite the fact that junk food is cheaper than health food. Did you know that our government spends over $7.5 billion of our tax money on ingredients that make junk food? One in five children ages six to eleven are obese. The government should not be paying to make ubiquitous [...]
26
Jul
The Nearby Future is back, and we’re ready to make another of our infamous, semi-annual pompous returns to the blogosphere. We’re paying our staff again (with chocolate and singing Hallmark Cards) and we’re re-vamping our goals. Not only is TNF like that nerdy guy in the horror movie who helps everyone else survive a little [...]
15
Jul
You people crack me up, do you know that? In the mighty league known as the “Staff of The Nearby Future”, we have a group of people known as the “Q Division”. They’re in charge of making super cool gadgets for our missions that we go on when we’re sick and tired of writing for [...]
10
Jul
56% of Ernest Hemingway’s novel The Sun Also Rises takes place in various cafes where the characters down liquor and coffee as if it’s the Sunday before Lent. Unsurprisingly, Hemingway also spent a vast majority of his time writing in these French Starbucks imitations. There are approximately 12,440 Starbucks worldwide. My favorite place in the [...]
Tags: coffee, coffee bean and tea leaf, coffeeshops, economics, elevate, starbucks, taking over the world, tully's, world takeover
4
Feb
Cliche ridden pep talks. What Valentines Day means to us single ladies. Denial. Friendship. It’s February, and that’s why we here at the Nearby Future.com are advocating the most important skill to master for the future! Communication. So, sit in a circle and let’s share something heartbreaking, hilarious, or honest. I’ll start. So I’m the [...]
Tags: circle, denial, failed relationship, feelings, importance of communication, rejection, valentines month
5
Dec
When I won National Novel Writing Month, I was super happy. So happy, in fact, I wrote this scene for the last scene in my novel: “Hey what’s this?” Rika asked, stopping at a particular news channel. On it, a brunette was standing behind a podium, giving a speech. AJ sat next to her on [...]
Tags: 30 days 50000 words, 50000 words, i'm a winner, NaNoWriMo, National Novel Writing Month, winner
31
Oct
So, November rolls around and everything seems like it’s softly declining into the realm of December. The drugstores have lazily put Halloween and Christmas displays right next to each other, the irony of the juxtaposition not lost on the customers. November, Turkey Month, or that placeholder month between winter and fall really isn’t lifechanging. For [...]
Tags: December, epiphanies, from my tumblr, goals, how to survive NaNoWriMo, NaNoWriMo, National Novel Writing Month, No turning back, November, Writers
18
Oct
The best, still fresh and relevant posts of TNF are here! Check ‘em out! Do You Want a Side of Doom With That? Where will YOU be when time stops? Smart stock advice: gauge how a company is doing using verbs and adjectives! Excessive use of verbs and sparkles! Why textbooks are responsible for dropout [...]
Tags: apocalypse tip: know your geography, Apocalypse Tips, apple, archive TNF, certified fresh, chalk one up for the blame game, do you want a side of dooM?, excessive use of verbs and sparkles, four ways to live forever, giving an old danger an old name, irregular posting schedule video, narcolepsy: to sleep or not to sleep, old posts, photo, reading material, smart stock advice, superstores, textbooks are responsible for droupout rates, TNF, what do you think when you hear CIA?, when time stops, why cake is so good, winning and losing inspirational story, yum! distilled water and crystalline fructose, zombies
17
Oct
Embarking on the journey that is NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) is like trying to domesticate a squirrel. You end up with some scratches and possibly a black eye or two, but in the end you uncover something valuable about yourself: your unhealthy obsession with seemingly friendly woodland creatures is a bit dangerous. So this [...]
Tags: 000 words, 50, action plan, domesticating squirrels, NaNoWriMo, National Novel Writing Month, novel writing, Noveling
11
Oct
When the Nissan Leaf comes to my city to offer test drives, you can bet I”ll be the first in line. What’s the Nissan Leaf? It’s the deliciously zero-emission all-electric trendy new car that makes gasoline obsolete. It’s not a golf-cart either. This car is the real deal and is perfect for city driving. All [...]
7
Oct
This month we’re resuscitating The Nearby Future with an age-old tradition. The Anecdote Circle. We’re social creatures here at The Nearby Future. We love talking the ears off of anybody who will listen. That’s why we run a site based on social commentary, with interspersed anecdotes about our personal lives. Like this morning I was [...]
Tags: anecdote circle, buying cappicinos, illegal immigration, illegally parking in handicapped spaces, insults, your face is a mixed number
16
Aug
Earthquake?
Grab your Go Bag.
Tsunami turns into a hurricane?
Find your Go Bag.
You ran out of ranch Wheat Thins and celery with peanut butter and two armed robbers just broke into your house, possibly wielding automatic weapons?
Go Bag it.
Tags: burglary, disaster, disaster prepardness, duffel bag, Go Bag, natural disaster, prepared
12
Aug
Look how cool they are! See, this is why there’s a disgusting amount of TV shows are about cops. Because these people just look so… so… stylish. I bet they could survive a zombie apocalypse without even trying. They wouldn’t need to find a Wal Mart or nothin! People like these guys get respected even [...]
Tags: cool police officers, cop tv shows, cops, police, police tv shows, stylish, supercool, survival, zombie apocalypse
10
Aug
Now, you may have heard that North Korea is nice this time of year. No pollution staining the skies, and plenty of missiles going off to keep things exciting. Now I have nothing against Kim Jong-il and his merry band of artillery, besides the fact he seems to like firing off lots of big guns [...]
Tags: abolish, firing missiles, korea, news commentary, north korea, rika, squid fishing, tensions North and South Korea, world, world takeover
5
Aug
I asked people what they thought change smelled like. They gave me the following flowery responses: Some people think change smells like the changing of seasons. The sweet smell of flowers waters your eyes as they usher in allergy season. The distinctive scent of perspiration kindly lets you know summer is on its way. Still, [...]
Tags: activism, cafepress store, investigative journalism, pirates of the caribbean, pirates of the caribbean 4, rika, set pictures, tote bag, website changes
4
Aug
Do you like reading a book that will warm the insides of your heart, teach you about human nature, show you the honest truth about growing up, and what life was like in the early 1900s? Then A Tree Grows in Brooklyn is a classic that will make you shiver with delight as you touch [...]
4
Jul
So I tallied up page views and it turns out I lost count at 123 with Sarah’s pages. So the winner of our staff page count contest is…. SARAH! Congrats, Sarah! I would also like to recognize Jane as best new author this month. You two rock, and you’ll both be receiving a small prize [...]
31
May
Many people don’t know what they want to do in life. John Kiriakou never guessed he’d end up a spy after college. He was a man with a love of politics and world history. He would sneak into Consulate Dinner Parties with his friends to meet and take photos with the senators he’d read about. [...]
28
May
Oh my dear lord, Sarah has saved the day. OUR OFFICE: As all of you wonderful people know, us writers at The Nearby Future don’t work nine to five at our office. We all meander in to work, make some coffee, and commence on our daily pillow fight. Sometimes we have to result to our [...]
13
May
Thinking of going on a diet? Want a New Year’s resolution that could save your life? The first step to any diet is to get rid of soda. The smartest resolution to make is to kick these addicting cans of caffeinated beverages out of your house. What makes this liquid candy a hidden danger? Check [...]
7
May
IMF? You heard a little about them? Nope, I’m not talking about the International Monetary Fund. I’m talking about the Impossible Missions Force. Word on the streets is that they’re screwing up our economy- and Greece’s- because they’re too busy blowing up buildings, fancy Italian sports cars, and paying for Tom Cruise’s- er, Ethan Hunt’s [...]
Tags: depression, IMF, Impossible Missions Force, International Monetary Fund, recession, Sarcasm, Satire, Tom Cruise
4
May
No joke. This was actually a school assignment Calister wrote in third person as an autobiography using his vocab words. It’s all true, by the way. Calister F. Wells was TheNearbyFuture.com’s resident numismatist. He loved coins and writing, so he wrote about coins all the time. He wrote about his ostentatious (and quite expensive) coin [...]
26
Apr
High school reunions, time capsules and Facebook are all great at reminding us how much we’ve changed over the years, and how our “when I grow up I want to be…” statements have changed. Several times. It’s a magical moment when you uncover a photo, video, memory or person from your past that meant a [...]
Tags: beautiful, chow down, letter to yourself, metaphors, recipe, reunion, rika, road, time capsule
25
Apr
Ladies and gentlemen, there are several things that are known to cause apocalyptic situations: Evil dictators Nuclear warfare When good TV gets canned When Glee, the show with barbed wire wit and snappy music numbers, and Chuck, the action-packed spy thriller/comedy with an endearing romantic angle, both encountered cruel and unusual hiatuses, the world went [...]
Tags: Calister F wells, chuck, Earthquake in Yushu, Icelandic Volcanoes delay flights, nurses strikes, Qinghai province, rika, sarah
17
Apr
Five feet from my desk, Calister F. Wells emerges from a nearby broom closet. I narrow my eyes at the staff member that currently holds the position for second highest amount of views.
“So, she’s trying to convince you, huh?”
“Convince me of what?” I ask, looking around to see where the ominous music is coming from. Calister is holding a boom box. I walk over and turn it off, crossing my arms. “Jala just gave me an article.”
“She’s trying to make you believe Frozen Yogurt is better than ice cream.”
Tags: battle to the death, calories, cold stone creamery, crossroads, flashback, flickr, froyo, frozen yogurt, Health, reality, subway car
13
Apr
Sure, us writers of The Nearby Future can blame our lack of writing on our schedules. Or even our conflicting jiu jitsu classes. But there was a real culprit behind our lack of writing. Our theme. Our old color blocks theme killed our ideas. With a lead pipe, in the conservatory with Mr. Green. So, [...]
Tags: amazing, articles, back in action, incentives, love, party favors, posts, Rika's three pronged attack plan to restart our dead URL, tasering, tasering people, tasers, the future, the nearby future, the staff, three pronged attack plan, TNF, we, witty, writing
20
Feb
There’s been a lot of films made, covering a barrage of topics. Sometimes, I’m tempted to wonder if there are any original ideas out there. In truth, there isn’t anything original. No story is original. Everything is based off of some basic plot idea: revenge, rescue, searching for a lost parent/friend/sibling/answers, leaving home to find [...]
Tags: books, ideas, movie ideas, screenwriting, scripts
23
Dec
Dancing. Who needs it, right? As someone who used to have two left feet waaaaay back when, I can empathize with those of you who hate dancing. But, in fact, it’s a necessary life skill. Dancing, in almost any form, can aid you in almost every situation. Have you ever seen a spy movie/action movie [...]
Tags: ballroom dancing, dance
26
Nov
Productivity. Progress. Working under pressure. Goal-setting. These are the skills that a month of novel writing will sharpen and perfect. Even if you’re not a writer, and you don’t plan on becoming one, spending a little alone time with your imagination for a month benefits you more than you can believe. As a novelist myself, [...]
Tags: 30 days 50000 words, adventure, month long, NaNoWriMo, National Novel Writing Month, planning, tips, word wars, writing