The Nearby Future: Back In Action!

Sure, us writers of The Nearby Future can blame our lack of writing on our schedules. Or even our conflicting jiu jitsu classes. But there was a real culprit behind our lack of writing. Our theme. Our old color blocks theme killed our ideas. With a lead pipe, in the conservatory with Mr. Green.

So, as head ER nurse in this attempt to resuscitate our dead URL, I am presenting the shock panels of this operation: the THREE PRONGED ATTACK PLAN TO BRING TNF BACK TO THE FUTURE.

1st Prong: Re-Motivate

In the first step, the entire staff will be figuratively tasered into action. New theme? Heck yes! New content, new categories, new publicity stunts… The Nearby Future will have so much going on that it’ll have to have caffeine intravenously pumped into it’s system to handle all of the new and exciting changes!

2nd Prong: Publicity Stunts

Within the next phase of our dastardly plan, we lure in unsuspecting viewers to our website with promises of new content, engaging posts, and boxes of chocolate. This is the stage where we jump out of airplanes with “The Nearby Future” logos strapped to our backs and where we have pirate battles in place of polite political debates.

3rd Prong: Incentives for Staff and Viewers

To keep a sitewide shutdown from ever happening again, our staff will be ordered to party once a month, and party favors such as pink tasers will be distributed. Expect spontaneous guest appearances of our staff on Survivor, Who Wants to Be a Millionaire and A Minute to Win It. Our viewers will also be treated with new and amazing top secret incentives to keep coming back! (Besides our re-energized posts, of course!)

The nearby future looks good,

~Rika